OPINIONS - Bart Wars

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;DRe: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by aoifestorm » Sat Apr 13, 2002 5:21 pm

:) Hooray for the 2nd installment!  I loved Abey-wan, I'm glad to see that he still needs to watch Matlock. ;D I liked the Scully-era reference as well.  I can't wait to see more of the script, I am really enjoying it, Karsten.
Homer eats a little too much Chile to strong pepper and is found with hullicinations amongst other things it speaks with a dog.
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by Karsten_Thiel » Sun Apr 14, 2002 1:17 pm

I'm sorry this isn't a balanced review, I'm just so happy to read this wonderful parody.
I can't wait to see more of the script, I am really enjoying it, Karsten.
Thank you, thank you! I had no idea it would be that good. :)
I was thinking of Robert as Obi-Wan.
Bob as Ben? Well...I guess the Robert Terwilliger from your stories would fit that role, but Sideshow Bob would only try to kill Bart...

BART: How did my dad die?
BOB: Cut in half with a lightsaber. Wait, that gives me an idea...
What flows from me nose does not go on the clothes.
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by Jace Kossmann » Sun Apr 14, 2002 3:23 pm

As a moderate Star Wars fan, I found you story to be farely enjoyable. I actually kind of envisioned Groundskepper Willy as Obi-Wan Kenobi but your casting is brilliant but the question is, when you do the next two, who will play Yoda? I would have chosen Hans Moleman but he's dead.

Still, the humor is very true to the characters.
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by IDPStan » Sun Apr 14, 2002 3:50 pm

*LOL* Great line!
Oh, I didn't think anyone would get it. Hmm...*wonders why a Klingon D7A battlecruiser would only carry one docter*
I should have known that line would be misunderstood.  

I've added another sentence to it ("I bet they won't be nearly as choosy as you, you...Church Boy!") to show what the Head Jawa was trying to say. Feel free to interpret that, too, if you like.

As for the other references to Earth religions, they'll stay. This is just a parody, after all, and not to be taken too seriously, and like Steve said, you can't have Ned Flanders in a story without some references to Christianity, can you?  

(And besides, I've never heard anyone complain about the fact that they had names like Luke, Ben, Owen and other English or at least English-sounding names in that "galaxy far, far away".)
I dunno about misunderstood but I still think the whole religion think stands out like a sore thumb...still at least if Flanders is that uncle guy then he'll get fragged. Oh and when he does be sure to use that line about only imperial stormtroppers being so precise and make fun of it, it's a given.

As for the names some of em have really weird names, I can thing of a few like Veers or Ozzel...although that admiral guy was called Akbar that made me laugh, he should have had a fez...
And Darth Homer will not strangle the Captain. I think actually showing the "execution" would disrupt the flow of the story (and I just like his line "Say 'eep' while you still can."). And besides, if he were to strangle every single incompetent officer, he wouldn't have much time for anything else.
LOL Just like the real Vader then! Awww come on pretty please...ok ok I give up.

I'll be sure to look at part 2 when I get the chance probably next week.
Last edited by IDPStan on Thu Jan 01, 1970 1:00 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by Karsten_Thiel » Wed Apr 17, 2002 5:55 pm

Just to keep you interested, here's part three, finally introducing the last remaining main characters.
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by Stretch_Dude » Wed Apr 17, 2002 11:00 pm

It just keeps getting better! Like...like...something, but I'm not sure what. I postively loved the Dr. Nick scene (very nice use of SW knowledge with his name), and I cannot wait to see who you've cast as Jabba and Greedo.
I memorized "Holy Grail" really well
I can recite it right now and have you ROTFLOL
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by hadisia » Thu Apr 18, 2002 4:26 am

Karsten-san, you rock!!
WELSH: What the hell was that?
FRASER: The sound of a grown man squealing in a manner not becoming a member of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police.
WELSH: Oh, Turnbull.
-"Mountie Sings the Blues," due SOUTH
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by aoifestorm » Thu Apr 18, 2002 6:20 pm

:) What can I say Karsten, this script just keeps getting better and better.  I had many guffaws from the latest installment. Among the parts I enjoyed...
Another Bender cameo
Abey-wan making that comment about Greenpeace while he was burning a pile of Jawas and bribing Wiggy with donuts
The Vulcan losing it for a moment while playing cards
The comment about how Snake has a death sentence in 12 systems
....and Mil Solo! I am sure you will have a lot of fun with that character.
I hope we see Part 4 very soon. :)
Homer eats a little too much Chile to strong pepper and is found with hullicinations amongst other things it speaks with a dog.
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by c_nordlander » Thu Apr 18, 2002 7:13 pm

Indeed very funny still. I love the Bender bits, Bart's complete disregard as to the death of his foster-parents, Mil Solo (you've *got* to have Milhouse as Han Solo in this kind of script, everyone knows that!) and, of course, Dr Nick's scene. Santabacca is exactly what I expected. And the torture scene... heh, I guess William Shatner's album had to find its way in here somehow. (Oh well, it's better than Britney Spears or the Pokémon theme.) Keep going. I still can't find any faults in this.

Oh, nobody's mentioned the Amazon yet. The Amazon had me laughing out loud! Now there's my totally favourite alien race on Futurama!
Say hello to the rug's topography
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by IDPStan » Thu Apr 18, 2002 7:57 pm

Comments about the second part of Bart Wars.

"Well, to put it this way, if there's a bright center to
the universe, you're on the planet that it's farthest from."

Yeah Tatoonie, worzel country on the outer rim.

"(absent-mindedly) Yes, that's what you'd expect, what with
the Rebellion and all..."

Yeah but just why does a Corellian corvette need an astromech droid anyhow? Strange never thought about that before.

"Aw, c'mon, it's not like you're my mother or something.
(sighs) But who am I kidding? I'll never get off this
rock, no matter what I..."

Heh heh, that’s what you think kiddo. You just wait...

"I am *not* nagging, I never nag, and I won't stop
nagging until you play that freaking message!"

LOL Wait to go contradict yourself.

"I told you to stay away from Kenobi! He's a
crazy old wizard, and you know that wizards
are..."

Senile old men who smoke pipes, carry a staff and wear pointy hats? Like...Gonedaft!

"The difference to other Imperial schools being?"

Heh go to the academy, no druggys there no doubt.

"It's not envy. It's just...I'm jealous, that's all."

Heh we're not lost we just don't know where we are. Heheehehehe.

"Look, I know you're not too happy on Tatooine, but
you have to admit that religious work can be fun,
too, huh? (nudges Bart) Huh?"

"!Ooooh yeah hours of fun trying to persuade idiots to worship the one true whatever...

"(sighs again) That's what I'm afrai-diddly-aid of."

Oooo didly, Ned's pissed off now.

"He runs out of the garage. After a moment's hesitation,
Marge gets to her feet and follows her."

Follows *him* surely.

"(sighs) Welcome to my world."

LOL How true. I mean just think you could be cleaning the bogs on that Imperial star destroyer by now.

"Ooh, rye bread and spring water! (rubbing his stomach)
Yummy yummy!"

*Looks at plate* And this is? Honestly how can he get exited about that?

"Bart's landspeeder is racing across the desert landscape,
piloted by Marge."

Heh if your thinking Bart's to young to fly it your gonna have a hell of a time with the X-Wings or snow speeders...

"Bart and Marge whirl around to see the three Sandbullies at
the entrance to the canyon."

Ooops time to go methinks.

"They run away. Maggie looks at Bart and Marge who
both don't move, whistles worriedly and quickly hides
under a ledge. After several moments, a hooded figure
appears in the distance. When he reaches the canyon,
he takes a handkerchief from the pocket of his robe
and blows his nose, resulting in the same eerie sound."

LOL So that’s how he did it!

"No, before "Matlock" starts. Come on!"

Oh yeah like they have TV on the worzel planet.

"Your dad wanted me to give you this, but your uncle was
opposed, as usual. I still remember his words: (imitating
Nedwin) "Weapons are evil, and no plaything for little
bambinos." (shudders) How I hate that nasal voice of his!"

Don't worry he gets what’s coming to him.

"(intrigued) Ooh, shiny!"

Kiki: Ooooo shiny!*looks over there* Oooo shiny!*poing*

"An elegant weapon for a more civilized time. For over a
thousand generations, the Jedi Knights were the guardians
of peace and justice in the Old Republic. (quietly) Before
the dark times. Before the Scully Era...I mean the Empire."

LOL Heh now that’s one gag I think we all approve of. Ram that scapegoat home!

"Look, I know it's hard for you to leave all this behind:
your aunt and uncle, the mission, Anchorhead Elementary,
your friends, everybody you know..."

Hard to leave that dump behind, that activates my hilarity unit.

"What's wrong with my pilots?"

Nothing except they fly TIE's with no shields and have a life expectance of about two weeks.

"That's very simple: fear. Fear will keep the local systems
in line, fear of this battle station and - to a lesser
extent - Michael Jackson."

LOL Dammed right. Oh this just keeps getting better.

"Let this be a lesson to you. Nobody messes with the Force
while Darth Homer is around."

Yes, you underestimate the power of the dark side mwahahaahaahahaha!

Well this is coming on nicely, I'm disappointed the next bit wasn't in it as I'm looking forward Neddy getting fragged and the journey in space. As you can probably tell from my quote comments I thought this one was a lot funnier than the last part. Oh and Darth Homer finally strangled someone! I liked Abe as Abye Wan. Yay! I look forward to the next part with bated breath.
Why is it always mayday to call for help? Why not something like…Shove Tuesday or Ascension Sunday? - Arnold Rimmer

You have joined the sacred order of The Stonecutters, who since ancient times, have split the rocks of ignorance that obscure the light of knowledge of light and truth. Now let's all get drunk and play Ping-Pong! - Number One
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by Stretch_Dude » Thu Apr 18, 2002 8:36 pm

"Ooh, rye bread and spring water! (rubbing his stomach)
Yummy yummy!"

*Looks at plate* And this is? Honestly how can he get exited about that?
This is Ned we're talking about! Remember? The man who refuses to buy insurance because he considers it gambling? The man who sees choosing which kind of peanut butter he prefers a "hornet's nest"? ;D
Last edited by Stretch_Dude on Thu Jan 01, 1970 1:00 am, edited 1 time in total.
I memorized "Holy Grail" really well
I can recite it right now and have you ROTFLOL
- "Weird Al" Yankovic, "White and Nerdy"

"Any pile of stunted growth unaware that entertainment is just that and nothing more, deserves to doom themselves to some dank cell, somewhere, for having been so stupid!! Movies, books, T.V., music - they're all just entertainment, not guidebooks for damning yourself!" - Nny

I draw too, dammit!
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by IDPStan » Sun Apr 21, 2002 4:09 pm

Comments about Bart Wars part 3.

"(looks down at the body) True, but he never had any
life to begin with."

LOL Heh too true.

"Sandbullies rarely get their hands on a weapons, but when
they do, they shoot better than this. Only Imperial
stormtroopers are that miserable shots."

Yes only stormbloopers are so inaccurate. Actually (and if you've played any of the Jedi Knight games you'll know this) it's the gun not the troopers. That Blaster rifle has s*8t accuracy.

"Oh, wait. I should have tried to hold him back, shouldn't
I?"

Oh well, too late...besides that would spoil the dramatic effect.

"Oh no...no..."

Oh yeeessss, ain't the Empire wonderful?

"I guess ol' Church Boy shoulda taken *me*, after all.
That's what he gets for being so pious! And where's his
Maker *now*, huh?"

LOL Ah Benders right as useual..but if he'd been there would he have faired any better? I think not.

"Close-up of the CD. It's entitled "The Very Worst of
Bill Shatner". The cover shows a singing William
Shater, with people in the background covering their
ears."

Oooooh cooooommmmmeee on there are some tortures to evil even for the Empire!

"(singing badly) Raindrops...keep...falling...on my
head...


Lisa screams."

Awwww brutal even Chris herself couldn't have done better...

"(watching the fumes rise) You know, if Greenpeace
ever finds out about this, we're dead."

Yeah I bet they got a corvette called the Rainbow warrior...watch out for ISD's...

"Let's not forget your aunt and uncle.


           BART

Uh...Yeah, them too."

Heh I guess that could be considered a good thing in some ways.

"I wanna be a Jedi, just like my dad."

Don't worry kid you'll be taught by the backwards talking insane midget soon enough.

"Mos Eisley Spaceport. You will never find a more
wretched hive of scum and villainy."

Oh I don't know about that, I can think of a few...

"(angrily) Don't rush me! I'm an old man! (to himself)
Boy, I sure hope those lightsaber fights are going to
start soon!"

Don't worry old man you get to go down fighting on the death plant.

"Winner of the "Scum & Villainy Award" '95, '96 and '98"

Heh heh, like New York used to be...

"(shaking his head) Eddie, Eddie, Eddie. With that
kind of attitude, you'll never get promoted. Don't
question your superior's actions, no matter what he
does. That's how an oppressive hierarchy works."

Don't forget throttling half the commanders in the navy.

"(takes out another box) These aren't the droids you're
looking for."

So much for force powers...bribery works just as well on them.

"You ain't seen nothin' yet."

Yeah wait till you see the squid people.

"Hey! We don't want no droids here!"

Spot the change of line, hehehehe. Besides what would droids do in a bar anyway?

"(annoyed) For the last time, those were *accidents*!"

Why do I not doubt that for a moment?

"(glumly) The worst. I was aiming for his weapon."

Heh, that was critical hit city. Mmm...chopped space bum...

"Pan over to the entrance where JIMMY THE SCUMBAG (seen
in "Lisa's Date with Density") is watching the group.
He smiles evilly and leaves the Cantina."

Heh is he gonna be like Menno? I.e. Dead from under the table blasting.

"(glumly) I *was* going to name her Millenium Falcon,
but then that lousy Corellian... (abruptly) But I'm
boring you with my story."

Heh heh, I guess they missed Han by a day or two eh?

"(sotto voce, angrily) Quiet, boy! I'm not *that*
senile!"

Oh yes he is...

"(sighs) I can tell you, Moe, patrolling the streets
of Mos Eisley all day can make you mighty thirsty."

I'd have thought it could make you mighty dead..

Well it's not as funny as the last part although I did enjoy the fragging of the jawas/farm. Indeed only stormbloopers are that bad at aiming. Abe's line about aiming for Snakes weapon was funny, I gotta laugh at Milhouse being Han. I think I know why you picked him though, heh heh. Abe's scene with the stormbloopers and the doughnuts was good, I guess the old force powers are getting a little rusty. The torture used by the Empire was cruel and unusual even by their standards! No one expects the William Shatner CD! On the downside I didn't like the Star Trek alien being in it, best leave that to Star Wars/Star Trek crossovers I think. Dr Nick was a little unnecessary too, he didn't really do anything. Overall I enjoyed it but probably not quite as much as part 2.
Why is it always mayday to call for help? Why not something like…Shove Tuesday or Ascension Sunday? - Arnold Rimmer

You have joined the sacred order of The Stonecutters, who since ancient times, have split the rocks of ignorance that obscure the light of knowledge of light and truth. Now let's all get drunk and play Ping-Pong! - Number One
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by Karsten_Thiel » Tue Apr 23, 2002 2:45 pm

Part four. The plot just keeps thickening like maple syrup...

Oh, and in case you're wondering, I've decided to give Mil Solo's ship a new, somewhat better-sounding (and sillier ;D) name.
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by c_nordlander » Tue Apr 23, 2002 4:42 pm

Oh my, yes! This script is getting definitely hilarious. The absolutely best line has to be Abe's on the Empire destroying planets:

"I don't know. Planets are pretty big. Not even a Stormtrooper could miss one."

BRILLIANT! Howsoever, other hilarious bits abound, such as (still) everything with Darth Homer and his stupid schemes, Moff Skinner getting angry, Abe's ranting about the old days, and Marge putting a stop to the fight. You've got loads of good parody in here.

The downsides: OK, I should have said this before, but you missed a chance to change the name of Mos Eisley (to what, you can probably guess). The fact that you're parodying the revamped version of the movie (that scene with Mil Solo and Tony the Hutt) threw me off my guard a bit, but nothing wrong with it really. Also, I think the discussion on the Force, fun as it was, got introduced a bit abruptly, there wasn't really anything to lead up to it. Maybe that was the point.

Bottom line: Nifty. Oh so nifty.
Say hello to the rug's topography
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Say hello to the shrinking in your head
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Re: OPINIONS - Bart Wars

Post by gkscotty » Tue Apr 23, 2002 8:48 pm

Yep, it's a supert parody you have here. :-) I'd say more but I'm jealous cause Simpmoon isn't this good. :-)
Image

It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone’s fault. If it was Us, what did that make Me? After all, I’m one of Us. I must be. I’ve certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We’re always one of Us. It’s Them that do bad things. - Jingo, Terry Pratchett
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