FIC: Raven Must Die (complete)

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FIC: Raven Must Die (complete)

Post by c_nordlander » Tue Feb 24, 2015 11:23 pm

Since the Venture Industries forum is now dead (it's still online, but posting has been disabled), I guess I might as well post my Venture Brothers fanfics on this board from now on.

So to start with, "Raven Must Die", written for a request by Missy. Set a couple of years from now, when Dean and Triana meet up again at university. Dean still loves Triana; Triana still loves Raven. Needless to say, there may be some drama.

Set in the same continuity as my story Seven Days to the Wolves, but the plots are independent.

Note: still a draft, so any constructive criticism is greatly appreciated.
Attachments
raven must die1.doc
(35 KiB) Downloaded 191 times
raven must die1.odt
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Last edited by c_nordlander on Mon Sep 19, 2016 1:40 pm, edited 7 times in total.
The noose draws tighter;
This is the end;
I'm a good fighter
But a bad friend;
I've played the traitor
Over and over;
I'm a good hater
But a bad lover.


Elinor Wylie, "Peregrine"
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (work in progress)

Post by c_nordlander » Tue Feb 24, 2015 11:25 pm

Chapter 2. Our protagonists actually meet up.
Attachments
raven must die2.doc
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raven must die2.odt
(32.05 KiB) Downloaded 160 times
The noose draws tighter;
This is the end;
I'm a good fighter
But a bad friend;
I've played the traitor
Over and over;
I'm a good hater
But a bad lover.


Elinor Wylie, "Peregrine"
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (work in progress)

Post by gkscotty » Wed Feb 25, 2015 4:18 pm

Oooh. I'll give this a read... though TBH I don't actually recall Raven at all, though I'm sure I can take a guess.
Spoiler
Image

It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone’s fault. If it was Us, what did that make Me? After all, I’m one of Us. I must be. I’ve certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We’re always one of Us. It’s Them that do bad things. - Jingo, Terry Pratchett
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (work in progress)

Post by c_nordlander » Wed Feb 25, 2015 7:33 pm

Thanks for reading! And urk, you're right about that one sentence. Looks like I fell asleep halfway through writing it or something. :)

Raven was only ever seen for a few minutes in "Operation P.R.O.M.", so it's not surprising if you can't remember him. His entire character was essentially that he looks like Edward Cullen and walks with crutches.
The noose draws tighter;
This is the end;
I'm a good fighter
But a bad friend;
I've played the traitor
Over and over;
I'm a good hater
But a bad lover.


Elinor Wylie, "Peregrine"
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (work in progress)

Post by missy_misery » Wed Mar 04, 2015 8:35 am

Yay, I'm so glad to see this here!!
Now known as Lisabella! (Or Missy.  Missy's good.)

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Crack!Fic, The Marge Simpson Way: "Just then, Sir Lancelot rode up on a white horse and saved Joan of Arc.  They got married and lived in a spaceship.  The end." - Tales from the Public Domain, "Hot Child In The City"
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (work in progress)

Post by c_nordlander » Tue Oct 06, 2015 11:01 pm

Chapter 3. Things escalate quickly as Triana gets some very unpleasant news from home.

EDIT: Reuploaded to add a couple of lines I'd forgotten.
Attachments
raven must die3.doc
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raven must die3.odt
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Last edited by c_nordlander on Sat Mar 19, 2016 8:42 pm, edited 1 time in total.
The noose draws tighter;
This is the end;
I'm a good fighter
But a bad friend;
I've played the traitor
Over and over;
I'm a good hater
But a bad lover.


Elinor Wylie, "Peregrine"
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (work in progress)

Post by c_nordlander » Tue Oct 13, 2015 9:37 pm

A heads-up: chapters 4 and 5 are finished, but I'm waiting to post them until I've finished the epilogue.

EDIT: The rest of the story is posted now, see below.
Last edited by c_nordlander on Wed Oct 21, 2015 12:32 am, edited 1 time in total.
The noose draws tighter;
This is the end;
I'm a good fighter
But a bad friend;
I've played the traitor
Over and over;
I'm a good hater
But a bad lover.


Elinor Wylie, "Peregrine"
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (work in progress)

Post by missy_misery » Sun Oct 18, 2015 7:27 am

YESS
Spoiler
Now known as Lisabella! (Or Missy.  Missy's good.)

Creator of the Waving Universe

Crack!Fic, The Marge Simpson Way: "Just then, Sir Lancelot rode up on a white horse and saved Joan of Arc.  They got married and lived in a spaceship.  The end." - Tales from the Public Domain, "Hot Child In The City"
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (work in progress)

Post by c_nordlander » Sun Oct 18, 2015 12:03 pm

Thank you very much! I'll upload Chapter 4 soon. (And your feelings may very well be correct.)

And thank you especially for catching that typo. I originally had the astral projection dialogue be in italics, then decided to just format it as normal dialogue with quotation marks, but I clearly missed that line.
The noose draws tighter;
This is the end;
I'm a good fighter
But a bad friend;
I've played the traitor
Over and over;
I'm a good hater
But a bad lover.


Elinor Wylie, "Peregrine"
c_nordlander
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (work in progress)

Post by c_nordlander » Sun Oct 18, 2015 11:39 pm

Chapter 4: "City of the Fireflies". Remember when this was a sweet college romance? Pepperidge Farm remembers.

Content warning: some R-rated language. I believe that's the only objectionable content.
Attachments
raven must die4.doc
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raven must die4.odt
(37.98 KiB) Downloaded 120 times
The noose draws tighter;
This is the end;
I'm a good fighter
But a bad friend;
I've played the traitor
Over and over;
I'm a good hater
But a bad lover.


Elinor Wylie, "Peregrine"
c_nordlander
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (work in progress)

Post by c_nordlander » Wed Oct 21, 2015 12:08 am

Chapter 5: "Aftermath". This is the important part of the story.
Attachments
raven must die5.doc
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raven must die5.odt
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Last edited by c_nordlander on Wed Oct 21, 2015 12:33 am, edited 1 time in total.
The noose draws tighter;
This is the end;
I'm a good fighter
But a bad friend;
I've played the traitor
Over and over;
I'm a good hater
But a bad lover.


Elinor Wylie, "Peregrine"
c_nordlander
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (work in progress)

Post by c_nordlander » Wed Oct 21, 2015 12:24 am

The epilogue. Well, it's been a good run.

Constructive criticism is, as always, highly appreciated.
Attachments
raven must die6.doc
(20.5 KiB) Downloaded 149 times
raven must die6.odt
(31.89 KiB) Downloaded 120 times
The noose draws tighter;
This is the end;
I'm a good fighter
But a bad friend;
I've played the traitor
Over and over;
I'm a good hater
But a bad lover.


Elinor Wylie, "Peregrine"
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (complete)

Post by missy_misery » Sun Oct 25, 2015 9:35 pm

Got both downloaded, will come back next weekend to feedback!
Now known as Lisabella! (Or Missy.  Missy's good.)

Creator of the Waving Universe

Crack!Fic, The Marge Simpson Way: "Just then, Sir Lancelot rode up on a white horse and saved Joan of Arc.  They got married and lived in a spaceship.  The end." - Tales from the Public Domain, "Hot Child In The City"
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (complete)

Post by missy_misery » Mon Nov 02, 2015 12:15 am

Part 4!:
Spoiler
Part 5!:
Spoiler
Part 6!:
Spoiler
The whole series is beautiful, well-constructed and highly worth reading! I LOVE it so much!!
Now known as Lisabella! (Or Missy.  Missy's good.)

Creator of the Waving Universe

Crack!Fic, The Marge Simpson Way: "Just then, Sir Lancelot rode up on a white horse and saved Joan of Arc.  They got married and lived in a spaceship.  The end." - Tales from the Public Domain, "Hot Child In The City"
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Re: FIC: Raven Must Die (complete)

Post by c_nordlander » Mon Nov 02, 2015 9:40 am

Thank you very much! You've always been the reader I most wanted to impress with this story (I originally started it as a request for you, after all), so the fact that you enjoyed it means everything. And thanks for catching that punctuation mistake.

Also, here's a link to the song Raven always wanted them to play at his funeral. (I recently realised that I put a lot more music references in this fic than I usually do. And ironically enough, most of them aren't to David Bowie.)
The noose draws tighter;
This is the end;
I'm a good fighter
But a bad friend;
I've played the traitor
Over and over;
I'm a good hater
But a bad lover.


Elinor Wylie, "Peregrine"
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