OPINIONS: Monologue For Circuits and Snark

[missy_misery]

SUMMARY: what was in that letter Bender gives Fry and Leela? The one that summarizes their future in a few simple pages? This, perhaps...

[c_nordlander]

Preliminary remarks: When I saw the episode in question, I thought "how long until someone writes a fanfic about what it said in the document?". I always thought it would probably be better to leave it a mystery. But then, you're a very, very good writer.

Having read this, it works. It's short, but it doesn't need to be longer.

The fact that you got Bender's voice so perfectly snarky is what makes this story. Nothing could be farther from Bender than sentimentality, and given that sentimentality was what I feared from a story like this, this is great.

I particularly laughed at how

Spoiler

he foresaw Leela hitting Fry and vice versa.

And this line: "Heh. I hope I’m here when you read this."

Other bits I love: the bit with the rocks,

Spoiler

Fry and Leela getting back together,

and the very last line.

As for downsides: I'm torn about

Spoiler

Fry wanting Leela to stay at home and raise the kids instead of running for Earth President.

It makes him come off as a jerk (and I'm not sure it's in character), *but* on the other hand, some real conflict is needed because of the slapping sessions, so I don't have too much of a beef with it. However, it does seem a silly thing to

Spoiler

divorce over.

That said, neither Fry nor Leela is the most mature person when it comes to emotions, so maybe they would.

Spoiler

Fry going to a suicide booth

might be a bit melodramatic, too. But then, it's hard to know without context.

All in all, a very good short piece with perfect Bender characterisation and many funny lines. The only thing I don't like is the breakup being for a pretty stupid reason, which makes Fry come off pretty badly as well. Still, it's a lovely interpretation of the document Bender wrote for his friends, and the writing is top-notch.

[Gulliver63]

I think you did a very nice voice characterization of Bender, something that I've had trouble with at times.

[missy_misery]

Thank you both so much for the feedback; Bender's my favorite character, to be honest (well, he and Zoidberg run neck at neck).

I've always wondered how much of the story Bender gave them both was made up; I wouldn't be shocked if he made it more melodramatic than it ever was. Will likely tone it down a tad in the final product.